Congratulations to Scott Blagden, whose YA novel, Dear Life, You Suck
First, a synopsis of your book.
“The shrinkadinks think I have a screw loose. Ain’t playing with a full deck. Whacked-out wiring. Missing marbles.” Irreverent,
foulmouthed seventeen-year-old Cricket is the oldest ward in a Catholic boys’ home in Maine—and his life sucks. With prospects for the future that range from professional fighter to professional drug dealer, he seems doomed to a life of “criminal rapscallinity.” In fact, things look so bleak that Cricket can’t help but wonder if his best option is one final cliff dive into the great unknown. But then Wynona Bidaban steps into his world, and Cricket slowly realizes that maybe, just maybe, life doesn’t totally suck.
I have to confess that I love books about foul-mouthed rapscallions. Now, for the bounty hunting questions. You’ve skipped bail, and a bounty hunter is looking for you. What three things do you bring with you?
My pet earthworm Slippy, a periwinkle crayon, and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
I hope you’re not planning on eating the three of them together, which is exactly what my toddler would do. So, where does the bounty hunter find you?
Sloppy Joe’s bar in Key West
Now you’re the bounty hunter. When three things do you bring with you while tracking your skip?
Night vision goggles, the handcuffs from my nightstand, and two peanut
butter and jelly sandwiches.
Technically, that’s four things, but I’ll give you a pass. I’m not going to ask about the handcuffs, though I’m beginning to suspect there’s a bit of rapscallion in you, too. Now, you’ve found your skip, right where you thought they would be. Describe your location and approach.
I’m in a tree outside her ex-husband’s apartment with my night vision
goggles, handcuffs, and one peanut and butter sandwich (I already ate
mine). I swing through a bedroom window on a rope from an old tire
swing. I’m wearing nothing but a leopard skin loin cloth.
Oh my. Yes, rapscallion it is. I’ve got you pegged. You’ve just caught your lucky skip, (and how could you not, after the surprise of the tire swing and loin cloth?) and you’re surprised to find them attractive. What three things make them irresistible to you?
1. She has a tattoo of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on her forehead. 2. She has really big teeth. 3. We’re wearing matching loin cloths.
Don’t you just hate it when someone shows up wearing the same loin cloth as you? Just pretend you planned it. That way it’ll be less…awkward? Thanks for the interview, Scott. Before you go, is there anything else you’d like to tell us?
If my skip were in a more formal location, I’d be wearing leopard skin high heels and a matching bow tie.
Who wouldn’t.
Want to hear more about Scott? Find him at his website, or on twitter. But don’t expect pictures of loin cloths. Believe me, I already looked.
